Last year, in THIS post, I wrote that I didn't have a single resolution. well kinda, but not really. I just wanted to live a year that I would not regret once 2013 arrived.
I went back this morning and re-read that post. Little weird but I'm going to quote myself here:
"Lord, prune me this year. Make me more like you. Help me to spend more time with my Husband. Help me to spend more time getting to know you. Help me to become more like you. Help me to be selfless and humble, quiet and gentle. Help me to see you each day of 2012, and tell others about you. Help me to be a light for Your Word and a witness for Your name. Break me of my pride."
I sat in awe this morning when I read back over that post I wrote this time last year. I had no idea that when I wrote those words, the Lord would answer. "Break me of my pride". Little did I know the power behind that prayer, and the ways the Lord would humble me. I will be totally honest and say that I used to be a very prideful person (still battle with it, duh, I'm a sinner). Goodness, this past year the Lord has done an incredible amount of work on me in that area. He's used close friends to reveal to me my short falls and setbacks. When I asked Him last year to make me reflect Him more, I had no idea that He would do so by bringing me a sweet baby boy. I didn't have a choice. If I am going to raise Canaan to love and seek the Lord, I have to (I HAVE TO) reflect Jesus to him at all times. Even when I don't feel like, I have to point him to Jesus.
Funny how the Lord answers prayers.
As you could probably tell by my lack of resolutions from last year, I've never really been a big resolutions persons. I'm not sure why. A few days ago, a friend of my husband posted this on his facebook:
"Living life without goals is like playing football with no end zone" -Scott Thomas
I realized that resolutions are good and needed. The Lord wants us to desire to reach goals that will glorify Him. So I started thinking about what goals I wanted to set for 2013 that would edify the Lord.
1. Develop a stronger desire and love for the Word. Memorize it, Rest in it, Share it.
2. Share the Word with my lost family. By the end of 2013, my goal is to see my loved ones come to know Jesus. I'm asking the Lord to let me be apart of that and to show me what my part is. Life is so short, Time here on this Earth is so temporary. I don't want another year wasted with them not knowing the Love and Grace of Jesus. The Lord has used this last month to make me realize that above all, His Grace is sufficient for me. I want, plead, and beg Jesus to make that true in my loved ones lives. Maybe my part is just pray harder. Or maybe he will allow me to speak His truth into their lives little by little. Whatever is its, I'm just ask He allow me the blessing of being apart of it. And if at the end of 2013, they still haven't come to know Jesus. I will still praise Him. For He is still good. And His timing is still perfect.
3. Become a proverbs 31 wife for Josh and Mother for Canaan. I know that I wont reach this goal. It's one that I will strive for my entire life. But I want to strive harder.
4. Keep my mind focused on Christ's return. NOT on this temporary, fleeting life. Yes, I want to complete some goals like finishing decor projects, improving my photography skills/business, and improving this little blog in many ways, but at the end of this year, I don't want those goals to have been the ones I strived harder to accomplish. I just want them to be little accomplishments I happened to complete. If that makes sense
5. Rest in Jesus. completely. and learn what it really means to do so.
Phew. This is going to be hard. I realize that. Satan is putting on his best boxing gloves I'm sure. He'd love nothing more than for me to fail. Thank goodness my God is bigger than he. In Jesus, I will rest.
So, 2013, let's see what your made of.